Making a Shadow Mask, Accepting your Shadow

This is part 3 in working with the Shadow Self.  Parts 1 and 2 can be found here and here. Once again, this is not work for those new to the Craft.  This is more for intermediate to advanced practitioners and if you would like to discuss with me what or how you are doing in this process, feel free to email me via the contact form to the right.  I always enjoy hearing from my readers!

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At this point, dear reader, you have been working with your shadow for a few weeks.  You have met and, hopefully, come to an agreement you can both live with.  Your shadow self is enjoying no longer being chained and no long having to live in a dark, empty space.  So, now what?  Now is the time to make your Shadow Mask.  It is time to own this piece of your Self, accept it for what it is.

When I came to this point in my own Shadow work, I was struggling mightily with myself.  My Shadow and I were having lots of fun, most of the time.  She, then, would throw fear, unattached to any trigger, at me.  That wasn't such a difficult thing to deal with, however, when she presented to me the feeling of superiority over others, I struggled.  The notion of being 'better' than anyone (not in a prideful way as if I won a game or competition, necessarily, but feeling superior) caused me never ending repulsion at myself.  Those who know me in real life can see that I am confident and that I know a fair amount of things, but if I come upon something that I don't know, like astrology, I freely admit that I am quite dumb to the subject.  I know what I know and I seek to learn more.

When I found myself looking at the muggles around me and feeling superior because I had experienced some of the mysteries of the world around me that they did not even know existed, I was appalled at myself!  However, that is Shadow Work.  Thankfully, I was learned enough at that point to recognize it for what it was (after the first time it happened, at least).  One day, the feeling persisted.  My Shadow was really putting it to me, and I asked her, "Why?  Why are you doing this to me?  This is not me and we both know it!"

Her response gave me pause.  "You have spent your life ignoring this feeling.  If you do not feel it and recognize it for what it is, then how can you ever keep yourself in check?  How can you keep yourself humble if you don't know what it feels like to think yourself superior?"

Of course!  It made complete sense when put in that way.  It was a horrible lesson.  I was uncomfortable and near tears.  I spent days afterward wondering if that was how the horrible people in my life always felt. (You know the type, those who think everyone is 'below' them and seek to punish those who might overstep their bounds.)  I gained a new perspective on myself and those around me.

This lesson came around the time it was to make my Shadow Mask.  The Shadow Mask is the physical manifestation of the Shadow.  We all wear various masks in life, but this mask is representative of the particular lessons your Shadow is teaching you right now.

Making the Shadow Mask

Making the Shadow Mask can be as simple or as elaborate as you want it to be.  The most important thing here is to carve out enough time to sit and do it.  This can be done within a ritual circle, if you would like, or you can sit at your crafting or dining room table.  Be sure that there are no distractions!  This is a time for you to go inward.  As you craft, bring your Shadow to the fore and ask him or her how they want to be perceived. 

Large craft stores have the plaster crafting strips that you cut, wet, and apply to your face to create a mask that will fit to your facial structure or, as I did, you can use a cheap paper plate (not the styrofoam kind).  From here, use paint, markers, glitter, feathers, beads, jewels, ribbon, or any other crafting supply you have on hand.  

This is your time to be creative and loving toward your Shadow.  In this process, remind your Shadow that you will never chain him or her again.  Remind your Shadow that you seek to come into balance and that he or she has a voice that will not be silenced again.  Build up your Shadow.  I told my own Shadow something like, "Today, we begin to work together in earnest.  Where we were getting to know one another before, building trust, today I manifest you into the physical via this mask.  I do this in acceptance of you and in acceptance of my whole self.  I will wear this mask to honor you.  I will acknowledge this mask in honor of you.  We are one.  We work together.  How would you like to be perceived?"

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Often, this acceptance of our own shortcomings is the most difficult part of the work.  Listening to our own darkness and the wisdom it holds is frightening.  However, if we do not hold counsel with the darkness, we become stagnant.  Only ever standing within the light can cause blindness.  This is why balance is so important.  This is why learning to work with our own negative qualities is needed.  We can not turn 'greed' into 'ambition' if we refuse to believe we are greedy.

Take this time to listen to your own darkness, but remember that you must not become your darkness.  Take your completed mask and put it some place where you will see it every day.  Acknowledge it and reaffirm to it that this is only the beginning.  Ask it how to get around, through, or over certain blocks you have on your path.  Sometimes, we find that it is the Shadow who put those blocks there and it is the Shadow who can move them.

Brightest blessings, Friends!!

The Shadow Self: Meeting Your Shadow

Apologies, dear readers, for not posting lately, especially after such a wonderful response to my last blog post.  Real life, as it often does, gets in the way, but I should be back, at least for a couple of weeks.

On the topic of shadow work, let me give those of you who may try this a caveat: Shadow work is often intense.  It requires a great amount of self-care (and I don't mean doing this work and then sinking into ones addictions, such as drinking, and going on a 3 day bender).  To face your shadow is to face the ugliest part of yourself.  It is to face those parts of yourself, which you have deemed unsavory.  It is to gaze upon the piece of yourself that you have abused, neglected, or otherwise subjected to horrible things within your life.  This is not easy.  This is not comfortable.  This can be a touch dangerous (as with any magical practice.)  So, tread carefully, my friends, if you choose to embark upon this path.  And, as always, if you would like to discuss your findings once you have begun, then please, feel free to email me using the contact form on the right of this page.

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Since we have discussed, in general, what the Shadow is, I will not rehash that.  Today, I will discuss ways to work with the Shadow, some negatives that can be turned into positives via the shadow, and post a meditation on how to meet him or her.

The inherently negative nature of the Shadow Self and our repression of it reveals many things about the society we live in.  As a culture, we are encouraged to ignore the more unsavory aspects of our personalities and, indeed, look down upon those who might engage in their own negative needs.  The absolute need for everything to be 'of the light' is silliness.  Even the darkness has its place and its usefulness.

We look upon thieves and murderers with disdain.  We look upon those selfish people we know much the same way.  However, those are aspects of the Shadow Self running amok.  If the Shadow wants to kill someone, we have to ask it why?  The reasoning is going to be varied, but it boils down to some reason dealing with the Self.  "This person took my -fill in the blank-."  "This person is a bad apple."  "This person is so horrible they don't deserve to live."

The Shadow can be quite violent if that violence is not released in an appropriate manner.  I knew someone working with the Shadow one time who would engage in violent video games to allow that Shadow Self to be as violent as it needed to be.  This is a good example of allowing the Shadow what it needs, instead of containing it until it reaches critical mass and there is a fist fight over something stupid.  My own Shadow was once quite violent out of frustration from inaction.  I refuse to engage in physical violence.  For me, I allowed her frustration to come out by writing violent and gory short stories.  Once those stories were written, we burned them.  Just because I know that I can be cruel, doesn't mean that I have to act upon that cruelness.

So, if the Shadow can be engaged positively, what are a few symptoms that our Shadows need to be worked with and how do we work these things out without our Shadow taking over?  First, we have to really examine our own behaviors.  (This is the difficult part.)  We have to look in the mirror and ask ourselves, "What are my own issues?"  Do you have a problem with anger, greed, fear, addiction, lack of self-worth?  Are you self destructive or do you simply let others around you run you over?  Obviously, these aren't the only questions to ask, but I find them to be some of the most common.  You have to look within to the things you know about yourself, the things you repress or don't want to admit, to find what you need to work on.  Once this is done, you can go to your Shadow and he or she will give you more things, from my own experience, the things you didn't even know you needed to work on.  Now, let's discuss fear and greed as positives before we get to the meditation to the Shadow.

Most people look at the words "fear" and "greed" and wonder just how those can be positive things.  Fear is an emotion of warning.  "Don't get too close to the edge of that cliff or you might fall!" "Don't go into the deep end of the swimming pool if you can't swim!"  "Don't touch that wild animal, it might bite you!"  Those are relatively healthy warnings of fear.  Being wary of strange dogs and other potentially dangerous situations is what fear can do in a positive manner.

Fear in a negative manner would be things like, "Meeting new people is bad and they will hurt you." "Don't do this new thing because it might not turn out like you want it to." "You know people are horrible, so don't bother with them."  "Don't trust anyone but yourself or you will be let down."  This is the Shadow running amok and putting irrational thoughts and emotions in ones head.

If fear can be good, then how can greed be good?  Greed is an excessive need for possessions or, even an unnecessary need for the best possessions.  It can be 'keeping up with the Jones'.  Greed can lead to the hoarding of stuff or money.  It leads to the irrational need of possessions over people.  Does this mean those who are well off are greedy?  Not necessarily.  Maybe they are ambitious.  I know many people who have what they have and they are satisfied with it, but they work toward the future.  They understand that there may not always be a steady paycheck.  They understand that there may not always be time to prepare for those things, so they work now to make sure that when times are lean they have what they may need. The ambitious strive to keep what they have in lean times while the greedy strive to have everything they want right now.

Having read this far, I hope you are a little more prepared to meet your Shadow Self.  I hope you have taken a good look in the mirror and acknowledged the things about yourself that you don't necessarily like.  Now, it is time to meditate.  Do not be shocked at the actions or state of your Shadow when you come upon him or her.  Assuming you are relatively adept at meditation, I will cut out the relaxation/beginning of the meditation because if you don't know how to begin a meditation, then you shouldn't be trying to meet your Shadow.

Shadow Meditation

1. Find a place you will be comfortable and uninterrupted for at least a half hour and begin your meditation process.

2. When you have reached a place of complete relaxation, visualize a door.  Open it.

3. The door opens to a landing with a corridor stairs spiraling downward.  You count the steps 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1

4.  This leads to a second landing.  This landing opens up to a cavernous space beyond the dim lighting, even as the stairs spiral downward more. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.

5.  You come to a second door.  It is closed and locked.  There are signs that this door has not been opened in many years.

6.  You know you are in the right place as you open the lock and the door.  You step through to the other side.

7. The room is dimly lit and as your eyes adjust, you take in the features of the room.  You pick up a movement and you walk cautiously toward it.

8.  As you get closer, torches spring to life, illuminating what moved.  It is your Shadow Self.  Look at it.  What have you done to it?  It reacts to your presence.

9. Stand there and watch it, out of reach.  When it stops reacting speak to it.  Begin building its trust in you again.  Ask it questions.  What does it need from you?  Tell it what you need from it. If your Shadow is bound in some way, make a bargain with it and release it.  (If it refuses to bargain, it is up to you if you want to leave it bound until you have created some bond of trust with it.)

10.  You have done all you can for now, so you thank your Shadow for giving you the wisdom you need at this time and you promise to visit often.  You turn around and leave through the same heavy door you came in through.

11.  Closing the door behind you, to ascend the first flight of stairs 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and come to the landing.

12.  Once again, the corridor narrows and you spiral up the next flight of stairs 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, and you have reached the first door.  You walk through it.

13.  Once through the door, you come back to your body, relaxed and refreshed and fully remembering this experience.

14. Write down everything you experienced with your Shadow.  Write down what it told you, how you felt when you saw it, what state it was in, everything.  Write down your bargain with it so you will remember and keep that bargain.

Once you have met your Shadow, it is paramount that you go back to that place and visit.  This is an exercise in trusting yourself and keeping your word.  Please, if you can not do this after care, then do not do this meditation.  DO NOT piss your Shadow off because you won't keep your word to take care of it.  This WILL do more harm than good.  Also, please, use common sense and don't simply do whatever your Shadow tells you or let your Shadow take over.  This is also very bad.

As always, dearest readers, if you are doing this and need to speak to someone who has been through it, you can email me via the contact page (at lightgoddess(at)gmail(dot)com) or you can contact me here.

Brightest blessings, friends!!