Friday, February 12, 2016

Building Up and Tearing Down: Finding Our Part in Daily Creation and Destruction

This new year has been a tough one for the Muse.  It has been fraught with changes and with people being people.  It has found me fighting to keep a positive attitude, specifically in the work place.  This fight has not been because where I work is bad, hostile, or otherwise not productive, but because with the changes we have had, others attitudes have changed.

My work place used to be like a well-oiled machine.  We all knew our jobs and we did them.  Sure, there were a couple of people who just had to stick their spoon in the pot and stir, but everyone knew who they were and no one paid them any attention.  Now, we have new people in management, multiple new employees, and people who have rolled over from part time to full time.  With the 'help' of some outside influences (I suspect), this particular combination has created a great deal of chaos and many are feeling the stress.  Because of this stress, people are shorter tempered (obviously), and those who would tear people down are taking advantage.

Just this week, I have been the subject of (at least) one person complaining about my work and my work ethic.  If I were a lesser person, I'd be very upset about this.  I'm not.  This particular person is 'low man' on the professional totem pole, with only my position and our secretaries 'below' them (we aren't below said person, nor is this person anyone's supervisor).  This particular person is also a control freak.  So, said person always has something to say about the people 'under' her and how they are 'lazy' and 'don't do anything'.

Then, our other resident control freak and pot stirrer likes to make a big deal out of the smallest thing.  Someone acted unprofessional, well, they must be racist.  No, they were frustrated and *gasp* human.  They had to blow a little bit of steam off and did it at the wrong time.  You, dearest pot stirrer, are looking for a reason to be offended.  You always do.  It's what you live for.

So, I got to thinking about all of this.  People have, over the past 3 months decided that it was okay to start tearing people down.  Now, if I had fucks to give about these people, I might be able to see where they are coming from, but I don't.  They aren't being helpful.  They aren't being constructive and, quite frankly, if they have time to observe and comment on the work and behaviors of others, then they don't have enough to do. I, on the other hand, have more than I can possibly accomplish in a day, so I don't have time to debate the job quality someone is or isn't doing.  And, frankly, I don't care.  I don't have the energy to give a shit if someone is doing their job right because I am, very likely, putting out fires that affect our unit due to screw ups in other departments.

This chain of events really started the hamster in my brain running.  I'm one person.  I'm one nobody of a person in my workplace.  What can I do when I hear people tearing each other down instead of helping?  What can I do?  I can build them up.  How?  Well, aside from positive affirmations and physically helping them if they are struggling, I have decided to invest in some cards, just generic 'be happy' kind of cards.

I figure that I can give them to both the person tearing down people and those who are being torn.  Will anyone do this for me? HA!! But, I don't expect them to, either.  I thought about taking sage oil and just sprinkling that shit everywhere and clearing the whole unit. (How fucking funny would that be?!?!)  Then, I decided that I didn't want to watch people lose their shit when they came upon the oil and it knocked the fuck out of their aura.  So, cards.  I'm going to put things like, "I see you are having a tough time. Hope this makes you smile" and "Yesterday looked like a struggle.  I hope today is better and if it isn't, I will find you some chocolate".

What I want to do is be passive-aggressive, though.  I mean, I am human.  I want to put things like, "I hope you aren't as grumpy today as you were yesterday.  No, really, smile!!" Or "We all have grumpy days.  I hope today is better than yesterday."  And then add glitter so when they pull it out they get glitter bombed.  I mean, bitches need glitter, right?

I told a co-worker what I was going to do and she laughed and told me that I was the nicest bitch she knew.  She didn't realize that she's going to be getting one of those cards, too, because her attitude has been crap of late.

I digress (and I'm losing the sarcasm).  I have come to the conclusion that I can not be part of the solution if I participate in the problem.  I know that people always tell you what they need, their insecurities and pet peeves, and often project those things onto other people.  So, when I hear people saying "X person is lazy because *insert reason here*", what I really hear is "This person is constantly doing *the opposite of given reason* and it makes me uncomfortable."  When I hear "X person doesn't do anything", what I hear is "This person is so busy they aren't reading my mind/doing what I think they should be doing and it makes me uncomfortable."

My work day often flies by.  I stay busy and can always find things to get into.  Others don't.  I think it's time to be more observant and, maybe even conspire with my supervisor, to start trying to build people up.  I often forget how much it takes for me to become truly intimidated by another person, so when these supposed insults about work ethic happen, I have to wonder what the person making them thinks of themselves.  I have to wonder what this person is saying about their own mindset.  Then, I wonder if they are having a moment of weakness or if they are just a small, scared child stuck in a body too big for them.  (Don't we all get that way sometimes?)

Well, Friends, there's this weeks food for thought.  When someone is trying to insult you, ask yourself, are they really talking about you or are they flailing about and looking for purchase because they are simply insecure?

Brightest Blessings!