Sunday, December 3, 2017

No, That's Not How Magic Works!

It's no secret that I have recently been trolling for blog fodder in facebook magical groups. While life has got me super busy right now, I have had plenty of topics to blog about. These topics seem to cycle in these groups. Right now, the requests seem to be "I need a quick magical solution to some hard mundane problem!"

People do not seem to understand that magic does not work like that. No, magic isn't going to cure (and likely not help) your child with severe ADHD. Giving him a routine, his medications, discipline, and your unending love, as well as some psychiatric help if you can't handle him will be more effective than magic. Giving him coping skills that will help him now and later in life will be more effective than magic.

Telling a young magician that s/he can destroy energy without any explanation of how is another delusional, and quite frankly, stupid response. Sorry, no, you aren't standing at your altar and tearing apart the fabric of space-time. No, you aren't going to defy gravity and levitate (although it is reported that Buddhist monks can do this. so I do believe it is possible, but not through magical means). I'm sorry, no, you aren't going to destroy energy of any kind and if you think you are, you need to brush up on your science.

Simply put, magic does not work that way. Magic is not going to make your eyes change color. Magic is not going to make your grandmother's cancer go away. Magic is not going to help you lose weight. At least it isn't going to help you in the way you want it to.

Here's how magic works:

So, you want to lose weight? You do a spell to lose weight. Three days later your friend comes over and tells you that she's doing Weight Watchers. Oh, damn, but you don't have the money to join with her. That's okay. She can teach you the points system as she's learning and you can lose weight together! BAM!! Your spell worked!

If you let go of the expectations you had for your spell and let your friend teach you, then it worked. If you turn your friend down and keep doing what you're doing and searching for the outcome you want, then your magic will never work. Period.

There is this very prevalent misconception within the magical community that intention is everything. (Thanks to The Secret, no doubt.) However, The Secret is wrong. Intention isn't everything. I can work at a shitty minimum-wage job my entire life with the intention of being a millionaire and never achieve that intention. Why? Because intention isn't everything. If I am not going to buy a lotto ticket, I can't manifest that intent. If I don't educate myself, then I can't manifest that intent. If I don't spend the time and effort working toward that goal, then it just isn't going to happen. People don't seem to understand that.

People also don't seem to understand that a shitty spell meme isn't going to manifest dick, especially for a person new to the Craft. Those of us who are a little more seasoned will understand that energy must be raised or we are working with the inherent properties of the tools used and should probably pull out the correspondence charts to make sure everything is in line with the intent of the spell.

What does that mean? Well, what it means is, a spell is more than simply lighting a candle, saying a few words, and blowing it out unless that's all it is, except that's rarely the case. Here is what I mean:

"Light a white candle, say an incantation, blow the candle out. Do this twice a day."

This was, literally, a 'fascinating' spell meme posted to a group.

First, is white the color you want or are you using it because it's the universal candle color? If it's because it's universal, then you need to charge it to represent the outcome that you want.

Second, the words you chant have power, but if you don't put anything behind them (or don't know to) they mean nothing. (There's your intent!!)

Third, why aren't you letting the candle actually burn? The inherent properties of the element of fire will aid your intent. Why not let them?

Fourth, what's so important about 2? Would another number fit this intention better or is two most appropriate? Is this just an arbitrary number given for convenience?

Fifth, how long do I do this? Do I do it until I get the desired outcome or until the candle runs out?

Sixth, won't blowing the candle out scatter the energy or air negate the fire? Would snuffing it be more appropriate? (Mostly, this is a question of 'do you know how to blow out a candle respectfully'.)

In the end, these 3 or 4 sentences become much more than just sit down, light a candle, intention, and incantation, blow it out, repeat. Also, I know that I have not addressed the idea of casting a circle and calling the elements. This was purposefully left out as I don't believe that some magics need a full-on ritual.

So, why is it that practitioners today need to believe that magic is a cure-all? I believe it's mostly because we, as humans, are always looking for an easy way out. We are always looking for the workaround. Well, magic isn't it. Sorry. I know all of the Llewlyn books you've read might say it is, but it just isn't.

If magic worked that way, we'd all be millionaires or beauty queens. Our wildest dreams would come true. No, real magic takes work, energy to achieve. Real magic exacts a cost from us, whether or not we realize it.

Brightest Blessings,
River

Sunday, November 19, 2017

The Rise of 'Black Magic' Spells in the Modern Era and Why They Are Garbage or You Don't Need a Spell to Change Your Life


Lately, I have been tooling around in Facebook groups for witches. Some of these groups are utterly laughable to people who actually practice magic. What I have noticed is that people take to Facebook (of all places) to beg for spells. They often do this after admitting that they know nothing of magic. Others post images easily googled into these same groups with absolutely zero commentary. The image below is one such 'spell' that has crossed my screen as of late. Neither the poster nor one other commentator could tell me why, exactly, this spell was 'black'. Now, I am of the thought that if you can't look at a spell or incantation and surmise, at least, two possible outcomes for it, then you probably don't need to be trying it. These days, critical thinking is essential and no one seems to be able to do it!  

So, let's break down this spell and see what makes it 'black magic' and decide if it will do anything more than give you gas.


First, we have our ingredients:

Lighter
Pink Candle
Musk Oil
Carving Tool
Marjoram
Pink Cloth with 'dream of me, be with me' on one side and 'just a little nudge' on the other, preferably hand sewn by the spellcaster
Pink or Red Pouch (small)
Glass plate

The lighter, carving tool (or knife/pin/needle) and plate are, kind of, self-explanatory. Lighter to light the candle, carving tool to carve it and plate to not make a huge mess on the table.

So, now, let's look at correspondences:

Pink as quoted directly from here:

 "The color pink is gentle and feminine and evokes the scent of apple blossoms and the laughter of little girls. Pink is calming and energetic all at once. Wear the color pink to evoke youthful energy and childlike joy. Pink can be used in magic for emotional love, tenderness, conception, babies, pregnancy, romance, youth, peace, emotional healing, inner harmony, femininity, and friendship. The action of the color pink is similar to that of the color red but gentler and more muted.
Wear and decorate with the color pink, or burn pink candles to relax and energize, calm aggression and relieve stress. The color pink is also used to suppress the appetite.
In Japan, the color pink is associated with the spring blooming of the cherry blossoms (Sakura) which are associated with the souls of warriors fallen in battle."

Musk oil as quoted directly from here and here

"A love oil used to arouse one's passion and heighten sexual pleasure. Also used to draw new situations and prosperity."


"Musk is Earth associative. It’s a good incense for restoring balance and order, realigning one's energies, sealing portals, creating barriers and protections, and removing the influences of negative magick. It’s also a good incense to burn to Saturn. Musk is also associated with chthonic deities and the underworld. It’s more concerned with underworld energies and accessing the underworld than bringing forth the dead. It’s a good incense to burn for certain underworld entities."

Marjoram quoted directly from here, here, and here:


"In magickal practice, marjoram is chiefly a love herb. It is typically employed in the creation of love-potions or attraction charms. It plays a major role in fixing spells and enchantments. In more practical applications, marjoram is useful for deflecting bad luck and accidents, as well as for promoting harmony in households. Burnt as an incense, it is said to banish discord where its smoke is wafted. Marjoram may even be used to help improve relationships and marriages, especially when combined with basil and rose petals. Marjoram incense or an herbal sachet made with marjoram blossoms and balm of Gilead buds may even be used to help with depression, to counter psychic attacks, and to banish bad or negative thoughts."

"Magical attributes: protection, love, healing.
Uses: Add to all love charms or place a piece in rooms for protection. Give to a grieving person to bring them happiness."

" This perennial herb ... and was known to the Greeks and Romans as a symbol of happiness and love due to its close association with the fierce and beautiful Goddess of Love, Aphrodite. Moreover, Marjoram is sacred to Isis, Egyptian Goddess of Love and all blessings.
This is why Marjoram is believed to be ESSENTIAL to any love spell (especially Love sachets). There are many ancient customs where a little sachet filled with Marjoram is woven into the bridal dress to ensure long-term happiness in marriage and to enhance fertility."

Ok, we have our correspondences and our ingredients. Now what? Let's look at the 'spell' and see if we can decipher what we are supposed to do. 

The first paragraph says: "Cast the circle, call the quarters. Dim the lights, leave a candle burning if you wish. Take the pink candle and anoint it with musk oil while thinking of the person who you want. Scratch the name of the person on one side of the pink candle and the word love on the other side."

(I will admit to paraphrasing here because I found it too wordy and poorly written.)

In the first half a dozen words, I see a problem for a new practitioner. If you can't cast a circle or call the quarters, you should stop right there and go learn to do that. If you can, let's move on. All prep, such as dimming the lights, lighting candles, etc. should have been done before the circle was cast.

The anointing of candles with oil can be done a multitude of ways, but it is easier to carve the candle and then anoint it so you don't have to try and get a blade or sharp object into a slippery candle. Also, there are specific ways to anoint candles to draw/attract and repel/banish that this spell does not address. Is the practitioner supposed to know this already? I sure hope so!

Now, we get to the 'grit' of this 'black magic spell'. Well, sort of. There are those who believe that because this spells focuses on a specific person, that it is an attempt to bend their will to the caster's own and is, therefore 'black magic'. I am inclined to agree, mostly due to my Wiccan training. That said, I do not judge those who would choose to do this spell because I can see multiple possible outcomes and, honestly, many of them include the phrases, "you got what you wanted" and "be careful what you ask for".

Place the pink cloth on the plate with "just a little nudge" facing down. Light the candle and affix the cloth to the plate by letting hot wax drip on the corners of the cloth. While visualizing your desire, use wax drippings to form the shape of a heart in the middle of the cloth. Drip some wax in the middle of the heart shape and place the candle there.

So, from what I gather with this paragraph is that this is a small piece of cloth with a lot of sewn writing on it. I'm still not sure why the corners need to be affixed with wax if there is going to be a wax heart in the center and more wax drippings to affix the candle. If this is a permeable cloth, such as a cotton blend, not all of this is necessary and adds complication to a rather simplistic candle spell.

Anyway, moving on. Visualizing ones desire. Do you know how to visualize? If not, guess what you should do. That's right, learn what that is and how to do it. If you do know, then you're good. Let's move on, shall we? Also, when are we going to compel the other person to "dream of me, be with me"? Why are we doing this at all? Is it for the 'dream walking'?

With the candle burning, empower a pinch of marjoram by pinching it tightly between your fingers and feeling the energy flowing into it. Sprinkle the marjoram in the place touching the heart and candle. Let the candle burn down.

And now we add the herb! I think we should be adding it to the melting wax, but again, the spell isn't very clear. However, the caster needs to know how to 'empower' things. Do you know how to move energy? If you don't, you aren't going to 'empower' anything. If you do, are you charging it with your own energy? Are you going to draw earth energy up or maybe draw down the moon? Let's get creative!! Obviously, though, a pinch is all we need.

Crinkle the hard pool of wax as much as you can while thinking of your desire. Take the remains of wax, marjoram, and cloth and put them in a small pink or red pouch. Sleep with the pouch under your pillow and by using dream direction, allow yourself to dream of the person you want.

Sleep like this for as long as needed until the day comes when you are going to see the person. Take the pouch with you. When you see the person, wait until the time is right.

Ok, so I have just added the last two paragraphs together. It's just as well to finish it up.

To complete the spell, you must, I think, break up the wax on the cloth while thinking of your desire. Now, remember, this cloth is affixed to a plate with the same, now hardened wax. Good luck getting that unstuck from the plate without a knife or other scraping tool not listed above.

Oh, have you been sitting in this circle for 12 hours waiting for this candle to burn down and the wax to harden? Did you leave circle while the magic was being completed? I sure hope you know how to cut a door to your circle. Did you leave the quarters called? They might be a bit unhappy as to have to wait around while you go on with life, don't you think?

Assuming that you know what you're doing and you finished the spell, released the quarters and circle, now you get to shove all of that stuff in a bag and sleep with it until you can find a way to orchestrate a meeting with said person you most desire where you take the pouch with you and wait until the time is right. 

Oh! You mean the spell is incomplete? What. The. Fuck! 

Yeah, this spell is incomplete, aside from being total trash, to begin with. However, I want to back up just a little bit and explore why one would even consider a spell like this. What draws us to the supposed taboo? What draws us to tempt the Fates and attempt to harness such god-like powers as bending the will of another to our own? 

Honestly? It's different for each person, but it comes down to control, power, and significance. Now, there are those who would argue that every choice we make influences those around us and bends their will to ours. Personally, I believe that if you are aware of how your words and deeds affect others, then you can be aware of when those words and deeds affect others negatively. 

It's all up to the practitioner, but the reality of the world we live in is thus: We are all always trying to do what is best for ourselves. We put our best face forward to get a job (and we could cast a glamour to do this). We tell people what they want to hear and show them what they want to see. 

This sudden rise in 'black magic' is a two-fold thing. It is people who feel powerless and want to have some kind of control (or feel like it) and it's those who would prey on those who feel powerless. What do I mean by this?  Someone is on eBay selling this particular spell for about $5 already printed on parchment for your BoS. 

If you do not know how to write your own spells, buying one won't make you powerful. This spell, literally, raised no energy toward the goal. Now, an adept practitioner will know when to raise energy and how to do it. In fact, they will be able to do it with a simple thought, but once again, one who is new will not have any idea.

This is the modern-day equivalent to the ancient grimoires. The ones published today have most of the magical sigils and words, but few of the practical things like correspondences that the neophyte would have discussed with the adept, the things that aren't written down. The powers of deduction and critical thinking are lost on most people today, which is why we have people selling 'powerful black magic spells'. 

If you aren't prepared to write your own spells, you probably aren't ready to try and perform anyone else's.

Please, don't blow yourself up.
River

(P.S. It's not lost on me that I didn't make any commentary on the actual correspondences. I did that on purpose. Maybe we could discuss why they are good or bad ingredients?)






Saturday, November 4, 2017

Know Thyself

Being the weekend of the full moon, and the final one of the Witch's Year (the sun goes 15 degrees Scorpio Nov. 6, marking Samhain) I thought it would be a good time to do a bit of reflection and musing on what it means to be Witch.

I have recently ventured into the world of Facebook groups for pagans. It has been both enlightening and terrifying. Most people post asking for spells, mostly money and luck and, occasionally, love. Others post asking for help of some kind or asking for (some demanding) free tarot readings.  Still, others post stating they have done some spell or another and why didn't it work and can someone help them.

To the last one, they get all of these responses of 'you can't doubt yourself' and 'it won't work if you doubt your magic'. Both good points, but neither addressing more than one potential cause of the spell actually not working. Realistically, there is an infinite number of points in the timeline where the magic could have been scattered, absorbed, or otherwise used up to make the magic not work.

First, the practitioner may need to change their perception of the world. In this world of 'spells are like prayers on steroids' people honestly believe that they can simply speak their desires into existence. Except, most people can't due to lack of discipline, faith, or understanding. To put it simply, it was doomed before it was begun to do subconscious concepts that the practitioner may or may not even realize they have.

Second, the structure of the spell could have been faulty. Spell and ritual creation are like baking. You have ingredients that must be added at the right time and in the right proportion with the right amount of catalyst to create the change. If any of those things are off, the spell won't work. What do I mean? Well, too much flour and your cake is dry and crumbly. Too much liquid and it is sticky and not quite done in the center but almost burnt around the edges. Too much heat, your cake burns. Too little and it doesn't cook.

Third, and this may be the most important one, if you want to learn these things, no one can do it for you. The manufacture of coincidence isn't a practice that one sits down and simply does from the beginning, just as one does not simply bake a cake at 5 years old.  While, yes, talent helps, discipline and practice hone the talent and sharpens it like the edge of a razor.

In a world of instant gratification and 'The Secret' type of thinking. No one wants to believe that discipline and practice are what it takes to become a magician. They believe that they can read a book on the basics and cast a spell to be a millionaire or to make someone love them. If that were the case, a witch would win the lotto every week.

The magical axiom, Know Thyself, takes on a new meaning once you turn inward and stop blaming all of the outside sources for your spells not working. Do you fear failure? Maybe success? Do you fear being found out? Who are You? What makes You tick? Once you figure out your fears, you can get on with becoming an adept magician.

Brightest Blessings, All!!
River

Sunday, October 1, 2017

Soul Contracts: Evolution Through Experience

I have been thinking about the concept of soul contracts lately. I can not say that I know the origin of the theory, and I know that some people believe the idea to be new age hooey. I'm somewhere in between.While we pagans like to attribute everything to karma, I am of the belief that some of our life circumstances and events our soul agrees to pre-incarnation. I am of the belief that our soul makes pacts with other souls in our group pre-incarnation so that we may evolve. How the situations and life circumstances are handled by the two egos determine the amount of karmic debt that is repaid. This repayment determines how far the scales come back into balance.

For instance, a moderately prominent adult in my own community was recently accused of, what amounted to, molestation by a child. Having known this adult and the child for the better part of a decade now, I would have a difficult time believing the accusations. My own thoughts were that the kid misspoke. Period. However, the person who was given the information, initially, is a mandated reporter. So, of course, once word got out this person had been reported, it was a huge kerfuffle.

The reported adult, let's call her Beatrice, believes that she was reported out of spite. Her friends also believe this. The mandated reporter, let's call him Aaron, has repeatedly espoused that he heard about abuse and reported it as he is required to do, no judgment. The parents involved could not or did not communicate to each other about their children, which is what led to this situation. No judgment. It is precisely what life is made of.

If indeed, a soul contract was made within this soul group of people, this means that seven souls came together and agreed on the general semantics of the situation: one would be the reporter to the authorities, one would be the reported to the authorities, one would be the "victim", one would be the "victim's" friend and secret holder, and the final three would have communication issues that may or may not have prevented the whole situation. Soul contracts sound as complicated as mundane contracts!

Despite that complication, we still aren't even to the heart of the possibilities of the implications of a soul contract. So, to cut down on complications, we will focus on Beatrice and Aaron, since it is their lives that will probably be the most impacted in the long term. (We all know how long adult's memories can be.)

We will talk about Aaron, first. Aaron heard about abuse and, as a teacher/mentor/clergy, is required by law to report it. This is difficult if you don't know all of the people involved, so knowing those involved, I can imagine made it even more difficult.

The one thing I noticed people telling him was that he shouldn't have reported a rumor. Another thing I noticed was that he was told that he should have used 'common sense and good judgment' and gone to the other adults in the situation, including the accused. While that is good, sound advice in most situations, that is not how mandated reporting actually works. Many people, including other mandated reporters, think that just asking an accused abuser if they are abusing is enough to get them to stop (if the abuse is actually happening and not just a wild rumor).

For a mandated reporter, reporting abuse is just that, mandatory. If one does not report suspected abuse, it can be punishable by a fine. That's right. A person can be charged with a misdemeanor.

So, despite the judgment of not using 'common sense', Aaron did just that. He knew, as a mandated reporter, that his job was to not judge a situation. He knew that he should only report it to the proper authorities and make sure that the child was safe. In doing this, he created ripples throughout the community.

Sometimes, we do the right thing and, despite that, we are roasted alive because, let's face it, people have no ethics these days. Aaron was lambasted by our local community. His name was dragged through the dirt, repeatedly, by people calling him various names and accusing him of predating on women. Oh, the libel flew! People kept asking him why he would do such a thing but no one wanted to hear that it wasn't personal. People wanted to believe that Beatrice was just being victimized by another man.

Aaron has stood firm, despite the attacks on his person, his values, and his ethics. He knows that he did the right thing and he knows that no matter how many people tell him he was wrong, he wasn't.

Now, we come to Beatrice. She was accused of molesting a child. She is an inherently good person who, for whatever reason, got caught up in this terrible situation. She, too, is a mandated reporter and should know how that works. This terrible accusation has put her career on hold, among other things.
She now has to battle the stigma of having been accused of something so terrible.

She also has to deal with knowing that her friends, in coming to her 'aid', chose to name call, harass, and accuse the other person. While she may not have actively encouraged this behavior, it was done on her behalf, so those effects are something that she will have to deal with, even if it is to say, "Not my words, not my actions."

So, what can they each learn from this so that they, as universal souls, can evolve? Well, first, these situations create thick skins for those involved. Those who do the right thing will always be accused of doing the right thing due to selfish reasoning. Those who are falsely accused need that thick skin to raise their heads above the mess and move forward.

Another thing to learn from this situation is compassion. What if the involved child was being molested but not by the accused? What if the child was being abused and didn't know how to bring it to the attention of the adults in his/her life because they are so busy being grown-ups that they did not have the time or energy or whatever to listen to the child?

Why didn't the accused 'step out' of her own inadequacies and victimhood for a moment to put herself in the shoes of the one who reported her? Remember, the accused is also a mandated reporter and may, one day, end up doing the reporting. Wouldn't that compassion for the other person also translate to compassion for one's self? I would hope so.

Probably the biggest lesson to learn from this is that knee-jerk reactions to situations show us where we are lacking in our evolution. If our first reaction is indignation or anger, we should ask ourselves why. Yes, false accusations are horrible. They are beyond horrible, however, if one is innocent, there's nothing to worry about. If there's nothing to worry about one can focus on things like compassion and understanding. (And, understand, I'm not suggesting that anger or indignation signals one is guilty. I only suggest that maybe one has something to hide if they are doing whatever they can to get the negative spotlight off of themselves.)

We all experience horrible situations in life. Whether we are accused falsely (or rightly) of some crime or we contribute to or witness death or we just encourage something we should not. Our own actions and reactions suggest what and where we need to learn the lessons we were put here to learn. We have soul contracts in place with people whom we reincarnate with throughout various lifetimes. These people, whether or not our ego knows it, are people whom our soul trusts and whose soul trusts us, to be the best vessel for learning the very tough lessons we must learn and endure.

These souls agree with our own about the varied and potential outcomes within that lifetime. On a soul level, we agree to hurt each other in order to find healing. We agree that our ego may get in the way and that it will add another level of hurt/healing to our soul's journey. These contracts are, sometimes, difficult to digest. Just remember, the next time someone seems to go out of their way to hurt you, maybe you agreed to it before you were born and there is a lesson to be learned from it.

Blessed Be, Friends,
River

Sunday, September 24, 2017

Of Gods and Internet Service

We live in a world where technology is everything and electronics are everywhere. We craft new names and personas for ourselves in cyberspace. We decorate it with art and photography. We forge bonds with people, real people, half a world away and angrily bludgeon our neighbor with our words on social media. We can influence the life of someone we will never get to meet face-to-face. We can live a second, completely different life, in cyberspace than what we live in spacetime. What if the gods reside in cyberspace with us? What if Brigid actively influences a young woman's interest in smithing through ads on Facebook? What if Loki plants the seeds of chaos by kicking out certain letters in emails and thereby changing the words and the meaning of the whole sentence? What if Bast preens in adoration of the billions upon billions of websites dedicated to cat-kind? What if Gwyn ap Nudd is mortified at the seeming ability of humankind of suddenly be immortal? What if our gods are alive and, very much, well because of the internet?

Some months ago, a friend suggested this very notion to me. The gods rest beyond the physical realm. They always have. They rest within a realm of pure energy. Is the cyberspace not that very thing? Is it not a space of pure energy apart from, but not outside of, our own physical realm? Why wouldn't the gods reside there and, importantly, why couldn't they mete out justice in within cyberspace for infractions committed within cyberspace?

Let's just go with the gods influencing cyberspace. Let's say that they have taken residence up there. What could that look like?

Well, what if you spent months or years being a jerk to people who really didn't deserve it? Maybe you spent some time abusing people who didn't deserve it, using them for their money or sex. Or, maybe you lied to someone, broke their heart. The scenarios are endless. You know, Zeus is a big fucking jerk and a god of justice (among other things). How dare you out-jerk him!! SMITE! Maybe your email is hacked or your Instagram. Maybe people get to see that you aren't really a jerk, just scared or hurt or insecure. There's your karma.

Are you a control freak? (I know that I am!!) Maybe the gods remind you that nothing is within your control when your computer gets held hostage by a virus that was embedded in a link you didn't mean to click.  Dammit! Loki, stop touching things!

Don't like someone you see on social media frequently? Does their face make you want to vomit? Why not just block them? No, no, don't be salty. Don't report them to Facebook! Damn. Now, Hera, stop being petty. You don't have to like everybody. What about when one of those stupid 'copy and paste' this posts comes across your newsfeed on Facebook, except it's not one of the stupid ones, but the number to the suicide hotline and you were just about ready to give up. Osirus is reminding you that it isn't quite time.

Is it too far-fetched to believe that Thoth and Minerva and sitting at a table at the local library, laptop screen to laptop screen, staring at each other in awe of our hubris and stupidity? "Do they even know that we have, literally, given them all of human knowledge?" Thoth asks, aghast.

"The greater question is 'do they know they carry it in their hands and pockets' and why won't they use it?" Minerva responds, exasperated.

"Have we failed?" Thoth questions. "Have we failed them so utterly?"

"No," Minerva responds, "some of them are listening."

The world we know is changing and we, as a people, are changing with it. Why wouldn't our gods adapt, too? Why wouldn't they use very real and concrete ways, such as the internet, to influence our thinking? Why wouldn't they use something that this, literally, their realm within our own to their advantage to guide those who are actively seeking?

Brightest blessings, Friends. Thank you got coming along with me on this journey. We are, officially, 100 posts in as of today!
River














Sunday, September 17, 2017

The Cult of Self-Importance and Delusions of Grandeur

This writing may strike a cord with a great many of you, dear readers. If it does, you should take note because I'm probably talking about you. This writing is not meant as a judgment. It is not meant as a verbal takedown of any kind. It is not meant to be any more than a reminder. It is a reminder of who you actually are and where you actually come from. Nothing more. Nothing less.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Since coming to the pagan community nearly a decade ago, I have noticed a huge culture change. Those who were once our teachers, people who put decades of work into their craft, are being ostracised or pushed into the background for younger, more beautiful, versions of themselves who promise enlightenment in 6 easy steps! These same people are charging their students through the nose for these 6 easy steps and in just a few months time, BAM!! You've bought enlightenment and can go on to be a guru yourself.

The problem is that enlightenment is not easy. What we, as pagans, are doing is very similar to when the Catholic Church sold Indulgences. You can't buy enlightenment, much in the same way that you can't buy forgiveness. We are creating this culture of self-important idiots with delusions of grandeur who believe that they can do as they please without regard to people or consequences. Yes, I used the word 'idiot'. I used the word idiot because it is the idiot or fool who blindly sets out toward a goal. It is the idiot who, in their own blind confidence, plows over anything and everything in their path, leaving a trail of destruction and debris, or as the tarot car suggests, walks straight off a cliff into the unknown that just might be one's own destruction.

We are, literally, seeing that in our communities today. Our teachers and Elders, the keepers of knowledge, are backing into the shadows. Many of them are shrugging their shoulders and letting people be who they are, where they are. Many are pointing out the snake oil salesmen and paying the price. Aside from human nature, why is that?

I suspect it is a combination of several things. First, we think that we can buy experiences. If someone is promising you something that will change your life, it is one of two things, either it's an exaggeration or you are going to have to work at it to change your life. I know more people than I care to count who demand these life-changing experiences. They jump from teacher to teacher, path to path, looking for that next spiritual high. The thing I have noticed is that these people always jump ship or get mad or don't have the time as soon as the studies get hard or time-consuming or super in depth.

In keeping with the 'this is not a judgment' statement, there's nothing really 'wrong' with moving from teacher to teacher. We are free to do these things as we please, however, there is a lesson to learn both the jumping around and from staying. I think they both boil down to 'what are you running from'? Facing the lesson is where the life-changing experience comes from or running to the point the lesson can no longer be ignored, that can also be life-changing.

Second, if you have to insist that you are qualified and repeatedly say fantastical things to 'prove' you are qualified to discuss a topic, then you are not qualified. Period. If you are 20 and claim to be some 10,000 year old Atlantean Fae, I'm sorry, you have just lost me. If you look me in the eye and, at 20, tell me you have the craft experience of someone twice your age, you can damn sure bet that I'm going to start asking you questions. Basic. Questions. And, you damn sure better know the answers.

Now, don't get me wrong, Therianthropy and Otherkinness are absolutely actual things. People absolutely are fae, elves, dragons, spiders, and other beings or creatures. I'd never debate that, having experienced what I have, personally. (See what I did there?? *winks*) However, if you have to announce your race to me as some kind of magical street cred, that lets me know that you pretty much don't have a clue, especially if I am a relative stranger and I haven't revealed who or what I am. If you, in any way, have to 'prove' to me that you're qualified (aside from an offer of credentials or a request for credentials) then, I know that you probably aren't. I also know that you need to feel important or needed or relevant or any number of other insecurities you might be feeling.

As a group, we also have this need to make sure that no one is left out. People like to beat their chests about how inclusive their group is. People like to brag about how the members of their group don't have to 'prove' anything or how they are so compassionate and give others second chances that they might not get otherwise. In a perfect world, this would be how things should be. This is a dangerous mindset, though.

Yes, most everyone deserves a second chance. I wholly agree with that. However, do you allow someone on the sex offenders list in your group because of the story they give you? Do you allow drug dealers, arsonists, and frauds in your group because no one else will give them a chance? If not someone who is a convicted felon, what about someone who likes to steal or lies? I certainly don't want someone who lies to me in my home!

The fact is, we all have some place where we belong. Sometimes that place is on the fringe. There is a lesson in standing on the outside and looking in. There is a lesson in standing at the edge of the group, yet not being included for whatever reason. It is not the end of the world. Sometimes, that lack of inclusion is the biggest blessing in the world! Sometimes, that lack of inclusion means that we do not have to pretend to be someone we are not. It means that we do not have to choose a mask to wear or a dance to perform to placate the people who included us.

Lastly, we live in a world where we are told that we have to be somebody. Extroverts are the best. Overachievers are the best. Leaders are the best. Excel at everything. No! This is out of balance!

Sometimes, it's the introvert who draws up the plans and then stands in the shadows watching the extrovert carrying them out who is the hero of the day. If everyone is a leader, who is there to follow? If everyone is in charge, who is there to do the work? So often in life, the work that needs to be done is the scut work. It's mucking out the hog pen. It's crawling on hands and knees to weed. It's sitting in front of Photoshop for hours on end hoping for inspiration and ending up with a blank screen. It is seventy-two interruptions as you are trying to write a blog and you really, really don't care about your sister's ratchet ass friends, but you listen anyway because that's what is needed from you at the time. That is the important work. Putting yourself and your own wants aside and giving to someone in need.

No, you don't have to be someone. You only have to be someone to the person who needs you the most.  You have to be the best you.

This cult of self-importance leads most people to delusions of grandeur. Once we die and return to the elements, no one is going to remember most of us. No one is going to wax poetic about all of the work most of us did. Once the shock or trauma in the psyche of most people we know passes and we are returned to the earth, our beingness is going to begin to fade. Our realness is going to begin to fade. They won't remember what a great leader we were. They won't remember how hard we worked. They won't remember how many blogs we wrote or spells we cast or tarot readings we got right.

If we are to be remembered, we will be remembered by how much and how often we gave of ourselves. We will be remembered for the kind words to those who were in pain. We will be remembered by the compassion we gave the dying and those whom they left behind. We will be remembered by how much we lied. We will be remembered by how we disdained people and how we went out of our way to hurt them. We will be remembered, not by how relevant we wanted to be, but how relevant we actually were and how we fed and nourished the people around us.

Don't fall into the cult of self-importance. Don't convince yourself that if you just... Then you'll be loved/liked/wanted/happy/whatever. Do the right thing. Do the thing that benefits others above yourself. If you have extra, give, be, do and do it because you can. Being a selfish twat never benefitted anybody.

Brightest blessings, Friends!
River

Saturday, September 9, 2017

Internet Trolls: A Lesson in Relevance

Recently, my local pagan community has been experiencing some drama, as happens when you put large groups of people together. The drama surrounds a teacher, who is a mandatory reporter, reporting some alleged abuse that was (thankfully for all involved!!) proven to be false. As happens when humans are involved there has been this huge, public, backlash because some people are less than honest and have admitted they would have looked away from the allegations using 'common sense' to determine they were false, while others of us would have just reported it as we are required by law to do and let the proper authorities investigate it and determine if anything illegal had been done.  To be fair, I do not believe that some of the people who admitted that they would have looked in the other direction have any idea what it means to be a court mandated reporter. I do not believe that they understand as a CMR one does not have a choice in the matter.  I do not believe that they understand as a CMR reporting abuse is not an option. All that said, as a mandatory reporter myself (due to my job) I publically agreed that what the teacher did was the right thing to do.

This firmly held belief in the law opened me up to an interesting internet troll. I get few of them these days. I suppose it's because I don't engage stupid or emotional well anymore. Without publically humiliating her and just posting screenshots of the attempted bullying, she dropped a lot of f-bombs (my favorite!!), told me I was irrelevant, and then told me to fuck off. I'm not sure where I was supposed to fuck off to since she was the one who messaged me, so I decided to fuck off to right here. 

What sparked my inspiration, though, was her need to invalidate my existence. She told me, a complete stranger, several times that I was irrelevant and my opinion was irrelevant. I'm not sure if that was supposed to make me feel less than or what, but the joke is on her. We are all irrelevant. We are all nothing in this grand work of the universe. All. Of. Us.

Of course, due to my training as a priestess and my inherent nature as a healer, after laughing at her statement of obviousness, I wondered why she would project something like that onto another person. I wondered just how many people had told her that in her life. I wondered just how miserable and emotional and powerless she must feel to think that it is okay to tell a literal stranger something like that.

There are people in this world who are inherently good people. They are good people who are a little too self-absorbed and emotional. They, obviously, haven't read The Four Agreements. I believe this stranger is probably one of those people. Life has wounded her to the point that to feel any kind of power or satisfaction, she thinks that she has to be a complete twat to someone she disagrees with.

Yes, I understand that her friend was hurt by the abuse accusation. I know the accused, too, but I refuse to tell the reporter that he did a bad thing. Because. He. Didn't. I hate that the accused is having to deal with this situation, but honestly, that's a whole other blog (which will happen!!)

Even as pagans, we often forget just how small we are in the grand scheme. In universal time, our three-quarters of a century lifespan isn't even a full blink of the eye. In our very human need to find significance, we will often try to extinguish the light of another if they question our status. We have come to the point of dehumanizing people and it is simply not necessary.

Aren't we supposed to be above such petty and, quite honestly, Christian things? Is it not the church who calls out anyone who questions its authority as a blasphemer? As pagans we really don't have a central authority, so we have all of these people who have read all of the 101 Craft books who think they know something. They forgot to read How to Win Friends and The Four Agreements. They forgot to read and meditate upon The Tao. They forgot to read Hawking and Kaku and they forgot to watch What The Bleep. In their hubris, they focused outward, on being 'somebody', and forgot to focus inward. They forgot about the wounded child or teen or young adult inside who screams and lashes out when something doesn't feel good. They forgot that our outward life is a direct reflection of our inward life. They forgot that because the macrocosm reflects the microcosm, anyone with eyes can see within. If your outward life is one giant pile of shit and struggle, what does that say about your inward life and why would I want to bring that energy into my life?

So, yeah, I'm totally irrelevant, but so are you and you are too blind to see it. In this great, wide multi-verse our existence is the very essence of fleeting. What legacy will you leave? Are you a brave internet troll who loves to cuss out total strangers and hope you somehow make them hurt like you are hurting? Good luck. Are you willing to say and do the hard thing because no one else will? Are you selfish and self-serving? Good luck. Do you give so much of yourself that there is nothing left for you? Do you simply do as you will regardless of the rules and when you get caught blame everyone else? Do you do nothing for fear of retaliation? Good luck with that, as well.

Relevance is a subjective thing in this world. If it gives you a sense of power to treat people the way you feel inside, then great. Do it. You can absolutely treat people the way that gives you the most power. However, when your ego puts you in a place where your belief is absolute and you think you are an authority on the relevance of another sentient being, you are simply being abusive and spreading your own, internal hurts. If you believe that it is your job to tear down another on behalf of yours or your friend's pain, then you are as much a part of the problem as the accused. Why are you not focusing your energy on helping your friend through this tough situation? Wouldn't that energy be better spent building up your friend instead of tearing someone else down?

Yes, let's talk about relevance. Let's discuss the microcosm and the macrocosm. Let's discuss how everything only exists by comparison.

Blessings, dear Friends, and next time you become so emotional that you want to lash out at a stranger, remember that that stranger may be a writer who has readers from all over the world. That writer just might use you and your words of pain as a lesson for others to learn from. Thank you random internet troll for telling me to fuck off after attacking me. As it turns out, I have a lovely place to fuck off to. And, no matter what the people in your life have told you, you matter. You matter inasmuch as any of us carbon meatbags matter on this plane of existence.